


Candy red and teal

by SkeletonHypetrain



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-19
Updated: 2019-07-19
Packaged: 2020-07-08 17:14:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 1,735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19873177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkeletonHypetrain/pseuds/SkeletonHypetrain
Summary: this is a revival of a stabdad story that i was thinking back in 2015.





	1. the barrel of good news

Spades slick was at the kitchen, reading the newspaper, it’s been months after he got married with Arman caeron: her troll-wife, a new day had raised for the slicks, until she arrived.  
Armant: spadey…  
Spades: yes?  
Armant: I have some good news!  
Spades: spill it out.  
Armant: we are going to have a grub!  
Spades: a WHAT?!  
Armant: oh..i mean baby!, I need to learn more about the human culture.  
Spades:so that means..  
Armant: you are going to be a father!  
Spades was calmed after that announcement.  
Spades: that´s great, im so happy.  
Armant: and it´s right here.  
The troll woman showed an egg to her husband.  
Spades: what the hell!  
Armant: I just laid this thing in the morning, I think that when me and my kind arrived to earth, it seems we had just modified, maybe I just reproduce like a bug or being with the mother grub…  
Spades was a bit shocked.  
Armant: don’t look me like that, do have a lamp.  
Spades pointed at the living room, armant came back to the kitchen with the lamp, as she turned on the switch, she put the egg near the light bulb. The egg showed a little grub moving.  
Armant: so this thing would be your son or daughter..  
Spades: that´s…  
Armant: amazing?.  
Spades: yes..but, do I need to give up my job?  
Armant: of course not!, you are going to be the coolest dad in the alternian world, so you need to practice your dad jokes while im going to say this to your parents.  
That day, spades was so happy before.


	2. almost humane

Some weeks had passed after the announcement, the couple were at the living room.  
Armant: spadey, what blood color should the grub have?  
Spades: I don’t know..  
Armant: I think it should be teal-blooded, like me.  
Spades: that´s weird.  
Armant: they told me that humans tell what the baby look like…  
Spades: studying humans?  
Armant: yes.  
Spades: well, you need to do some activities.  
Armant: yeah, I want to make that activity when the female is preg.  
Spades: you mean.but how you will manage that?  
Armant: look at this.  
Armant pulled out a belt that looked from the airplane ones, she used to put the egg on her and hide it on her shirt  
Armant: im a genious!.  
Spades:…

Later…  
Instructor: ok, all you have to do is to breath in and out, you can do it!  
Armant: too easy  
Random mom: for you, you grey-skinned freak!  
Random husband: honey, don’t say that to the troll woman, you need to breath in and out.  
After those activities, the couple was at the nearest seven eleven  
Armant: man, being a human sucks  
Spades: said the troll.  
Clerk: wow, hey troll woman!, really kicking the cravings right?  
Armant: what?  
Clerk: you are chugging down a whole bottle of cotton candy faygo!.  
Armant: oh, im not preg, is because I just…  
Clerk: oh I get it, you are an alternian troll, gee, things changed when those kinds of people arrived.  
Armant: im learning about humans.  
Spades: she´s trying.  
Clerk: oh,aren´t ya spades, oh sorry, don’t shoot me!  
Spades: of course im not.  
Armant: oh c´mon, don’t threaten the boy, lets get a pizza.


	3. is not delivery, it´s digiornos

Armant was at the living room, reading some magazines about humans, but suddenly she felt something..  
Armant: oh..,SPADEY!  
Spades: what?  
Armant: the egg..it´s going to hatch!  
Spades: oh, don’t worry..  
Armant: there´s an alternian hospital,don’t worry, quickly!,to the batmobile!.  
Spades facepalmed.  
Hours later, they arrived to the hospital, hours passed, and the egg hatched.  
Spades was at one of the rooms, he saw a nurse holding a being in a blanket.  
Troll nurse: congratulations Mr slick, it´s a boy.  
The nurse gave to him the grub, the being had black hair, grey skin and horns, the grub stood at him.  
Spades went to see armant, who was lying on the hospital bed.  
Armant: hi slick, can I see the grub fella?  
Spades: yes.  
Armant hold the grub, she was amazed.  
Armant: oh my god..he has mutated red blood!  
Spades: what´s wrong?  
The teal blooded troll looked at him.  
Armant: well, back in the day I was into alternian history and, you know that I told you about my favourite story about the signless.  
Spades: yes..  
Armant: you know that candy red blooded trolls or mutated blooded trolls are culled, but I don’t want to cull my troll.  
Spades: but why he has that.  
Armant: oh, is because interspecies relationship between humans and troll has a percentage of mutated blooded offspring.  
Spades: that explains everything, have you ever thought of a name?  
Armant: nub-nubs  
Spades: nub-nubs?  
Armant: look at his nubby horns, it´s so cute..  
Spades: hmmm  
Armant: aren’t you happy that we are parents?  
Spades: yes I am, and he´s beautiful  
Armant: yes,he is,your parents are going to be happy when they are going to see their grandson.  
Spades:yeah.


	4. the miswonders of parenthood

Armant caeron was at the park with some of her troll friends, who also were with their grubs.  
Sterling: well guys, as a jade blooded troll, taking care of grubs are more than a responsibility than a job.  
Deering: you got it.  
Armant: well guys, it´s time to present to you: Nub-nubs  
As she showed the grub, everyone gasped.  
Sterling: Armant, it´s a candy red blooded troll.  
Armant: I know,I know.  
Jaden: don’t you know that this grub has to be culled.  
Armant: I don’t want to cull my nub-nubs.  
Jaden: well, maybe I wonder how he can socialize with the other grubs.  
Armant: let me do this.  
Armant put her grub at the sandbox, nub-nubs saw the other grubs and played with them.  
Armant: see, they are happy.  
Jaden: oh, you were right..  
Sterling: well, so welcome nub-nubs!  
Jaden: you have anything planned for later?  
Armant:yes.

Meanwhile, slick was reading a book about parenting, he heard that someone entered, it was armant, her face was painted in black and white which resembled a clown, she was holding her son, and also his face was painted, he was drinking a bottle of cotton candy faygo.  
Spades: armant,where have you been?  
Armant: oh, I baptized him at the juggalo cult  
Spades: you what?  
Armant: what, don’t you know that purple blooded trolls are also juggalos.  
Spades: why are you giving this, he needs to drink milk.  
Armant: oh you, nub-nubs has teeth, you know that grubs have know their fangs, and look, he likes cotton candy faygo, like me.  
After nub-nubs finished his drink, armant placed the empty bottle on the table.  
Armant: c´mon slicky, check out nub-nubs´s teeth!  
Spades: let’s see…  
Then nub-nubs puked the faygo  
Armant: hahaha, he threw up.  
Spades: I see that he has teeth, If you excuse me, I had to clean this up..

At night, the couple saw their lil´grub sleeping.  
Armant: is he cute…  
Spades: yes..,but have you already think about a proper name?  
Armant: but I prefer nub-nubs..  
Spades: we´ll talk about that later, but I need to stay a bit up, I have to work with some friends.  
Armant: being a criminal is a hard job..  
Spades: yes…  
Armant: but don’t worry, we are still a family.  
Spades: thanks   
Armant: what possibly go wrong..


	5. i´ll run to you

Armant was in a base with her husband and son, thinking what happened, a threat for the trollkind had arrived to earth, many adult trolls joined the fight, including her.  
She looked at her husband,who was holding nub-nubs.  
Slick: are you sure about what are you going to do?  
Armant: yes, i´ll be alright, after this, we shall continue our lives as a family, ok?  
Slick: ok.  
Armant: Don’t worry about me, i´ll be alright!

As she went outside the base with some other adult trolls, the group arrived at the fields, armant pulled out her pizzacutter-kind, the battle had begun, it was some intense hours, sterling and jaden were injured, the threat was coming near, they thought that it was the end, but suddenly, her friend appeared, the threat stabbed her, both jade blooded trolls realized that she sacrificed her life..

Meanwhile at the base, slick was worried about if her wife was ok, but he saw a hospitality tent, he rushed to the tent, he saw many injured adult trolls, but he found her wife, who was badly injured, a troll doctor was making the best to cure her  
Slick: ARMANT!  
Armant: slick…  
Slick:…  
Armant: im not sure if Im going to live.  
Slick: don’t said that!, you said that we would continue our lives..  
Armant: but..not for me….  
Slick: don’t go..  
Armant: spades, thanks for everything…  
Slick tried to not cry.  
Armant: hey..i know how I shall name our nub-nubs  
Slick: tell me.  
Armant: karkat nub-nubs slick caeron vantas.  
Slick: again with nub-nubs?  
Armant: yes.., please…take care of our little nub-nubs.  
Slick: I promise..  
Then armant closed her eyes..  
Troll doctor: oh god, we are losing her..oh no, it´s too late..  
Troll doctor: sorry mr slick, your wife died…  
Slick silently sobbed, he stroked armant´s forehead, remembering the good moments that he had with her.

Days later, during the funeral, he saw that some troll friends were there, but sterling was the one who grieve a lot during armant´s death.  
Spades´s friends gave the condolences to him, at this day, spades, more than a husband. He just became a widower.


	6. epilogue

``dad,wake up!, we are going to be late!´´ a voice made spades woke up, the voice came from a young troll wearing a black shirt with the cancer symbol on it, he was drinking a bottle of cotton candy faygo.  
Spades: alright karkat, i´ll be back in a minute.  
Years had passed after his wife´s death, life continued as usual..  
He looked at his desk, there were some photos of him and her wife when they met for the first time, and some of them about her doing jokes.  
Karkat: dad!.  
Spades: all right, im coming.  
Spades and his son went to the alternian cemetery to visit someone special.  
Karkat: hi mom..  
Spades: hello sweetheart.  
The two of them stared at the gravestone.

Here lies Armant Slick caeron,  
Caring mother,loving wife, brave warrior.

The end.


End file.
